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Friday, March 23, 2012

MURPHY'S LAWS OF STAR FLEET BATTLES, part 9

81. Always lab drones from a scatter-pack. You can at least admire the enemy's brilliant new loadout before you die.

82. At Range Zero, fire control is irrelevant.

83. If the enemy got to Range 4 when your plasma tubes recycled, you were on passive fire control.

83. Targets for the PPD are in one of two places: Out of arc or in the myopic zone.

84. Your enemy will point out a rule you did not know just before the point you were going to win the game. Your girlfriend will be there to watch.

85. Klingon phaser arcs are great when you are shooting and lousy when you get shot.

86. If you wait one more impulse to fire, your weapon will be destroyed.

87. If you are calmly expecting to win, you don't know all the facts.

88. Make mistakes; it confuses the enemy.

89. Your most brilliant term paper will be lost in a server crash.

90. Just when you announce your NSM trap, you realize you wrote down the wrong hex number.

-- Garth Getgen, Steve Cole, Steven Petrick, Larry Ramey, Kirk Spencer, Jessica Orsini, Ron Sonnek, Andy Vancil, Ben Moldovan, Mark Kuyper, Howard Berkey, Timothy Steeves-Walton, David Keyser, Oliver Dewey Upshaw, Carl Magnus-Carlsson, Kirk Spencer, Richard K. Glover, Jeff Zellerkraut, Andy Palmer, Sean Newton, Daniel Zimmerman, Jason Goodwin, Michael Sweet, Paul Stovel, John Sierra, John Sickels, Sandy Hemenway


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